Podcast Episode #41: Matt McKee - Parenting & Technology
Posted: Oct 17 2016
Matt McKee is an experienced entrepreneur as well as a former employee at Fellowship Church in Grapevine, TX. Currently, he serves as the pastor of students at Horizon Community Church in Cincinnati, OH.
His latest passion has been helping families understand how to better use technology and establish safeguards for kids in his latest book Parent Chat.
Matt is also a Dallas Cowboys and Bengals fan.
Buy PARENT CHAT by Matt McKee
PARENTING & TECHNOLOGY
"The desire for connectivity and constant connection isn’t new. It’s just that technology makes it possible."
- We have a yearning for connection.
- Technology gives us the ability to have a constant connection.
3 Paths to Technology:
The Path of Acceptance - No matter what new technology comes out we are going to adopt it and accept what is happening today.
- Comes with ACCESS.
- Kids explore in a different way than adults do.
- Leads to fear.
The Path of Rejection - Some groups reject whatever the “latest and greatest" is.
- Your influence on the community, connection, and the world will diminish.
- Leads to a lack of influence.
The Alternative Path
- How do I give it purpose?
- How do we not lose influence and how do we not become fearful?
- What is the end that we want?
“Technology can do amazing things, but there is one thing it CANNOT do."
- Technology cannot replace relationships.
- The more time we spend looking at a screen, the more we crave real relationships.
- Your relationship with your kid will not be hackable.
Adults see it as "what will this do for me?". Kids see it as "what will this do?".
- Adults ask: How can this help me be more effective?
- Kids are much more exploratory not effective.
- There is a lack of purpose and meaning when kids use a device.
How Do We Take Steps to Improve This and Get to Know Our Kids Better and the Technology Around Them?
- More technology solutions are coming out.
- Comes down to the conversations we have with our kids.
- Ask your kids: What is interesting to you?
- Ask your kids: What are your friends doing that you think is wild?
- Ask your kids: Can you teach me how ____?
Conversation VS Rules / Statements.
- Reggie Joiner - As a parent, you go from control to influence as your kids get older.
- Rules are control. Conversation is influence.
- Ask good questions, but don’t interrogate.
Keys to Good Conversation:
- Ask good questions but don’t interrogate.
- Ask for their opinion or input not facts.
- Hoping to see the world as they see it.
Guidelines for Asking Questions to Your Kids:
- Don’t ask about technology - Kids don’t separate non-technology and technology / Talk about their life.
- Ask for their opinion or input, not facts.
- Listen carefully and ask a follow up question - The more you listen and follow up, the more information you will get.
Putting Safeguards in Place:
- Circle with Disney - Helps you automate the important.
- Circle Go - Helps you outside of the home with mobile device management.
Are we able to use technology to better our family relationships?
- We have to understand how to have a healthy relationship with technology.
- We have to be able to model it as parents
- Give technology purpose and meaning.
- How can we help it make a difference in our lives?